I’ve been thinking about how to write this. Many of you have already posted yours, that have either dealt with separately or combined these elements – looking back and looking forward. Last year, I didn’t have all that much to look back on, for I had only been blogging for six months. I was still trying to find my way, and it wasn’t till the WordPress statistical review showed up that I decided to dutifully act on it, and make a few plans for ‘blogging 2015’. But, I’ve decided not to focus only on how far I achieved those goals, and what goals I hope to achieve in 2016. My main goal, for all things blogging and beyond, is to change strategy completely. It’s the new year, and for once, I’d really like things to be new.
I think a lot. The couple of essays that you get week after week, month after month, are usually products of much deliberation. They are not fresh in my mind when I write them, nor are they over and done with when I have published them. In fact, I have noticed how my opinions on things have changed over the past 1.5 years, when I myself do not agree with some of the things I believed in before. As annoyingly as film companies, I feel the need to come up with sequels for my own essays, or take the route of our current Golden Age of Television and write a series on something for which a single post isn’t enough. I’ve done both to some degree in the past year, and you haven’t been too hard on me for contradicting myself. Contradictions are good, you know. They may not get you anywhere, but they make you more honest and open to situations.
But, my new, life-changing strategy for myself is to feel more. I’ve been feeling it already, the need to feel more, in the last 3-4 months, and I’d like to work more on that. I’ve been wanting to go on a culture detox, which maybe the death knell for a culture blogger and addict, but hear me out. I’ve had enough of talking about books and music and the mind and behaviour of people. I don’t want to leave civilization and go and meditate somewhere, but I want to experience the objects of beauty and excitement in my world without feeling the need to assess them. I want my writing to become more impressionistic. I’ve been logical, analytical, organised for the last ten years in my life, and I feel it really isn’t who I am. I am not the opposite either, so don’t think I’m going to go destroy the system or something. Instead, I want to integrate.
It is universally believed that writing is provocation. Power. The pen is mightier than the sword et al. And it is true, for the foremost aspect of our culture, our lives is writing. Social media. Commentary. People who couldn’t be bothered with writing even a paragraph in school cannot imagine a life without texting. I’ve imagined myself a writer before all this, and was quite an activist in my mind when I was young and brave. But, now, writing for me has to be accommodation. I’ve always had two major goals in life. One, to be making things, preferably in the arts. Two, to help people. I’ve found both quite difficult to achieve in surprising ways, but I feel I can integrate both in what I feel I do best – write. Yes, yes, I only have a humble little blog, one that hasn’t progressed much statistically in the past year. But, I am going to let all those writing/blogging/living rules and expectations be, and go with my guts.
They need a break themselves, especially with all my horrid food habits lately. ‘Get healthy’ is definitely a classic goal that remains on the list this year, as it will for all eternity, for all of mankind. But, mostly, I am going to go deliberately against the grain for myself and not try and organise life into lists, only to feel bad about not accomplishing them. This past year has been very erratic for my blog here, and though I did achieve most of my goals that I set last year, I didn’t always enjoy it. In fact, I felt like quitting many times, but only stayed put because of the kindness of strangers, i.e. you, dear readers. I believed that you cared about what I had to say, and so I kept trying to fulfil that, no matter how contrary I felt. I am not being cheesy or sentimental when I say this, it really was you that kept this blog going for the whole of this year. I am totally gobsmacked when I look back at all the things I posted here for an entire year!
Thank you for sticking around, for supporting me, for sharing your views, for helping this blog grow. I can’t estimate the effect it has had on its readers around the world, but for the one-woman writer/creator/editor/showrunner, it has meant so much. So, unquantifiably, much. Therefore, keeping with my supergoal for 2016, here’s a heartfelt thanks and cheers to you for the year we leave behind and the year that is upon us!
What are your 2016 resolutions?