I am about to do something dangerous now. Wait, wait. Not yet. Ah yes, that is decent. About alright. 6 sentences. I have revisited a blog I started a year ago. A blog which no one read. Well, 22 views out of which 12 were probably mine. The rest people wandered into and wandered right off. I started with a post called Of Course which brought a few in and then took them out. Maybe they stayed the while, maybe they even pored over. But that wasn’t enough, you see. The mysterious visitations of people unknown with WordPress accounts wasn’t enough to keep me going. No comments, hardly any views, no communication made and there you go. Another grand idea, one that dared to think about sharing opinions about opinions went cold. The Lethe-wards sank on this humble internet aspiration and no one really cared. Not even the one who made it happen.
The idea was two-fold. Make that three. Oh, I obviously can’t count and mathematical skills aren’t required to form opinions. The idea was to write a blog, at least weekly, based on Francis Bacon’s essays, without the aphoristic style and not always discussing the same subject matter. And I thought, ha ha, wouldn’t it be clever of me to name it ‘Of Opinions’ since that is what people always have opinions about, though those opinions about opinions don’t go on for more than a sentence. And of course (again), it wouldn’t be opinions about any real situations. It would be a sort of “culture” blog, how people choose to spend their time when they do not have to concern themselves with survival. So yeah, it wasn’t one of those big money-making by blogs schemes. It actually had a nobler, grander and ultimately more pretentious agenda. I wanted to, in a way without being too specific about it, “only connect”.
However, Of Opinions went off course because I thought , yet again, no one was going to read this. I may have attempted around 6 blogs in the last 8 years and well, I have never been able to take off. And it is not because of any personal issues or whatever that causes people, especially aspirational bloggers, to quit. It is simply because I don’t understand blogging. I see successful bloggers and I find it frightening. This whole internet space out there (ain’t I tech-savvy?) is quite simply baffling to me. And yet, there isn’t any other, simply just isn’t any other way, to make a connection through writing. You might pick a guitar and go busking in the real world, among real people and still make a connection even with YouTube cover videos being so popular. But you can’t even spray paint your ideas on walls as people are just too darn busy being inspired by content on their smart phones or even taking a picture of your graffiti instead of actually reading it. In fact, it is just too dated to even be baffled by the internet. That was so 2004. Don’t you know twitter is so Facebook, Facebook is so MySpace, MySpace is so yahoo cha t(um, MySpace? yahoo? that sounds so 90s man! I should get that printed on my crop top!)?
To write right now is to want to be noticed in a sea of billions of shapes that become alphabets and words when cognized. Better post a picture instead which is a more arrestive visual than boring words. Words that have to be read. Why can’t you just look at them? Why can’t you just admire the font instead (that font is so 18th century!)?
So, why do I want to come on course again after being off it? I am still as baffled, still as clueless about how to connect, still a head of ancient, delete-able ideas, still badly in need of an upgrade to technology for commoners in 2014. But I just thought, what the heck, let’s write. What’s the worst that can happen. I’ll get a pain up my spine. No one will read it. No one will care to connect in our “internetly” way through comments. And maybe that is ok. Maybe this time I’m gonna let that be ok. Maybe I could dare to take some space in the blogosphere(I already am part of so many other “spheres” and that’s the 20th century born person talking again) and no one will mind or not mind. That is, hopefully they will mind. That’s the plan anyway.
There, onwards, on course. Of writing. Of opinions. Of connection.